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Female Impersonation
Impersonating the professional working woman is that gal out to get your guy!
By S.D. Craig
Published October 2001

Having only one point of view, a female one, I'm not sure what males think about their wives in the workplace. I'm up for discussion on that, too. But women in the office -- that's where I'm headed.

I grew up believing that one should act and dress professionally on the job. Sexy outfits were not considered work attire. I had enough trouble without it.

My first boss later told me he hired me because of my nice legs and that when I left the office that day, I was facing the sun and he could see through my skirt. Great. Had I forgotten my slip? Was I shocked at his years later revelation? Yes, though by that time, I knew this man well.

This same boss would send me to a store a few doors down for change several times a week, even though I'd told him the owner, an older man was harassing me. The boss thought that was funny and I was too young to know how to handle the jerk. The guy was pushing me up against walls, trying to kiss me. Worse yet, he was older than my Dad. I had only to admit this to my husband-to-be or my Dad but I kept silent. I realized it would create a mess. One in which I might lose my job.

Life moved along. Notice in recent years (more so since sexual harassment charges have become the norm), that women are dressing sexier, flirting often and dating men at work? I'm taking a wild guess that could mean they're having more affairs then they did thirty years ago when I started working.

Did wicked women sprout up out of the earth when the sexual harassment laws were passed? Seems to me some were, and they went hog wild, now feeling protected. Yep, some of those females began doing, saying and wearing whatever they wanted to work.

That's all well and good, if you're looking for a husband. But what about our husbands? What about our men out there? I was invested in the ten-year marriage and nine months pregnant with our second child when I found out my first husband failed the test of a woman on his job coming on to him. He bit, and bit but good. And his boat no longer floated in my port, honey 

I'm better off without that man, but the bottom line is, what's wrong with their men? Why are these women looking at ours at work? Wearing skirts slit up to here (what happens when they sit down at work, is this Sharon Stone all over again?), and necklines down to there. Where do they get off swaggering through the office like they're trolling for trouser trout?

Ladies, it's our fishing hole, ain't it? Stand up for our rights. If they're trolling, let's toss them in the water, I say.

Business lunches with these women, are they a necessary evil then? Do you have to hear your husband on the cell phone while out having lunch with a woman, their laughter tinkling in the background? Oh, she's having such fun, and with your man. That's right but it's business, and that makes it just fine in their eyes. That's bull puckey.

If things are business, conduct them in the office, shall we? Leave those lunches out to the single sex-in-the-city types. You never know who is under that slinky dress and what she's up to.

Impersonating a professional working woman? It's an insult to the intelligence females have worked so hard to be recognized for. If these women would keep their skirts down, their necklines up, and their hands to themselves, some work might get accomplished. And, oh by the way, THAT man is taken.

About the writer: SD Craig is a freelance writer and editor of LovingYourCurves.com and was given the nickname "Chatterbox" by fellow writers. At age fifty, Craigs Southern flair and sense of humor give her plenty to write about with a rapier wit and a wacky outlook. Her articles on body image (her biggest passion), marriage/divorce and relationships, family, friends, career issues, computers, the Internet, horses, baseball, movie reviews and writing tips remind one of Erma Bombeck or Dave Barry. A freelance writer who once juggled five columns then got real, Craig welcomes your e-mails and feedback on her articles. Drop her a hello at sdcraig922@yahoo.com or stop by www.lovingyourcurves.com.

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